Lessons learned: Use it or lose it.

Christmas night the obvious choice was to stay right next door at Mo and Ronnie's. They were in Paris (Texas) visiting Ronnie's folks, so the only one we'd be imposing on was Drew. He's hard to impose on - and I don't mean that it's uncomfortable to impose on him - rather he is so laid back, you never feel for a second that you're imposing. We set up camp with Drew Christmas night. Same for the next night - we were scattered in assorted beds and couches at Mo and Ron's. After they arrived home on Sunday and we had spent some time together crying, and laughing, and crying some more, we told them we were going to move on to Mary Beth and Jim's house for the next few days since they were out of town til New Year's.

It's very hard to not feel like an imposition when you are four large humans (of fragile mental health) and two large canines (one of whom is still learning her manners) and when hefty bags full of donated clothing and toiletries and the kind souls who are donating or transporting them follow you. It's not that we don't appreciate the hospitality, or the love, or the generosity, or the kindness - we do, more than we can ever express. This is just when it really hit me that we no longer had a home. And *that* felt very strange (and sad). I want to go home.

So off to Mary Beth and Jim's for a few nights and then back to Mo and Ronnie's for a few more. In the midst of all of this, our amazing neighbors George and Barbara and Mo and Ron were scurrying around - they were on a mission.

There is exactly one house on our cul de sac that is a rental. It happened to be vacant. The neighbor brigade went to work.

The landlord lives in Houston. Another family on the cul de sac (neighbors of the rental house) act as his "property managers". There were a few things stacked against us. First, one of the property managers is deathly afraid of dogs of any size or breed so I know she was not really pulling for us since that would put our 100+ pounds of canine right next to her home. Secondly, the landlord didn't want to rent to people with two fairly large dogs. Thirdly, he was not happy about leasing for less than 12 months. But these hurdles did not deter our fearless neighbors. They apparently begged, and pleaded, and negotiated, and cajoled (and quite possibly threatened, though they'd never admit it) and just 9 days after we lost our home, we were handed the keys to the rental. Our same cul de sac, our same awesome neighbors. This was a great comfort because it was familiar at a time when everything seemed upside down, and there was the added benefit of being close by for the reconstruction. And, oh yes, there will be a reconstruction.

I've digressed so far that my title is no longer in sync with my story so bringing it back around - the lesson that I intended to share was this:

We were seriously not operating on all cylinders. We didn't know what to do - there was no protocol - so we leaned on our friends. We didn't think we should spend money until the insurance folks provided guidance (which took a few days and a few conversations because - get this - the "emergency" team wasn't working seeing as how it was Christmas and all). We stayed with friends and ate their groceries. Later we would learn that insurance would have covered any and all living expenses beginning with minute one after the fire. Of course this came with certain stipulations. There is money set aside for emergency living expenses, and it's a fairly generous amount - but they are particular about how it can be used.

Once we found this out, we asked - can we be reimbursed for any meals? The answer: no. This is because we stayed in places that had kitchens and in that case, meals are not covered. How about using it for grocery bills? Or to have our friends' homes cleaned? Nope, and no. It didn't occur to us that we should be living it up it a fancy hotel and eating at restaurants. Had we done that, insurance would have gladly footed the entire tab. As it turned out, trying to save money (both ours and the insurance company's) by relying on the kindess of our friends meant that the emergency living expenses pool dried up. None of what we did could be reimbursed.

Funny how things work.

Lesson learned: You use it, or you lose it.